Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
