you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Congratulations! We have a period
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
