yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
