my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
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