Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
