I saw his package. It spoke to me.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
