Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
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