Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
