Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
