just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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