I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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