a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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