On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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