Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
