I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
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