Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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