Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize