Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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