guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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