Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Randomize
