just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
