D3 body, D1 cock
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
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