My Higher Power is John Stamos
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
