I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
