The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
