This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
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