I want to have your abortion
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize