Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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