I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
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