I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
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