its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
