my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
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