Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
