we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
