All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize