They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I enjoy the company of your penis
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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