Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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