I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Randomize