my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Randomize