just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
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