we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
