Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
