Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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