Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Randomize
