yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
of course. lets lasso hookers.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
