with your own penis?
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize