So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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