why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
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