Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
