they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize