Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
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After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
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